Today we are still in the of Octave of Christmas. The
Jewish faith celebrates all great feast days in a series of eight days, or
octaves, and that tradition has carried over into the Catholic Church. Our
secular world has us so wrapped up in the Christmas marketing whoopla of buying
gifts, decorating everything, and spending our money so our spending stays
high, which fuels our taxes, etc….. that by the time Christmas gets here, we
can be “burned out” and tired of it all. By now some families are putting
Christmas “away” because they have been looking at things since right after
Halloween. We need to take in this precious time and season – relish the gift
of God sending His Son to us as a human to walk with us and to talk with us.
Celebrate the fact that the three wise men are still on their journey to see
the Christ Child.
We had a great Christmas 2012. Our family all got to be
with us for the celebrations, and a good time was had by all. I got my
Christmas projects completed, and they turned out well. Kolbe even sent grandpa
a short video riding his rocking horse and watching Toy Story with his cowboy
hat on. He picked up some new cowboy boots yesterday, so he should be all set
up.
I had prayed to God earlier this year that I could have one
more good Christmas, and that I would not be sick over Christmas. I love this
season, and I do not want to have everyone remember it as a sad time because of
my poor health. God answered my prayers, and we had a good time.
I have been having some pressure headaches over the past
month or so, especially when I lie prone at night. The doctor has me on a small
dose of steroids once again, which will help to relieve that pressure and ease
up the headaches. I am taking about one seventh of the dose I was last spring,
so not such bad side effects yet, but I have taken to waking up after about 4
hours of sleep once again, so the keyboards may become more active. This may or
may not be good for all of you.
Our brain is in a confined space with only enough room for
what is supposed to be in there. With treatments of chemo to the tumor areas,
there is some edema, which can cause a pressure build up. Over time these
fluids will dissipate, if they have enough time. In the meanwhile, one gets a
headache. The steroids reduce the swelling and relieve that pressure more
quickly, so they help. I have not had to take as many pain pills as I did when
they first started. I also have to be on a blood pressure medicine now, since
one of the main side effects of Avastin is to increase one’s blood pressure.
Cancer is so different with everyone, I am learning, it
mutates and fights the meds we are on, and most of the meds we take to fight it
kill cells, so the treatments can be the killer and often are, but we also know
what will happen without treatments. It kind of boils down to taking the
treatments until they reduce the quality of one’s life to a point where they
are no longer valid to use, then we let things run their course. The doctors do
what they can with what they know, but this is a terrible disease. I especially
do not like to see what many people have to suffer through in their treatments,
so pray for all of those who are living with cancer now.
We have Matt
and Jen’s wedding to attend and to dance at in April, so I need to pray now for
good health through at least that month. I think I will be just fine. I do not
have the stamina I once had. I can do a few things, but then I need to rest for
a few hours. Probably getting too old and not working out much anymore either.
I will try to start to go for walks more now after the holidays.
After our MRI in January, we will see if we need to step up
to the next level of chemo. That chemo will make me feel nauseated, hair loss,
more weakness - all the good stuff. We can then perhaps lose those twenty
pounds I put on when I got on steroids the last time. The doctors tell me to
not worry about being on a diet, but to eat healthy foods that make one feel
good. I think they mean healthy foods, not healthy portions, but I was always
somewhat confused with that stuff.
For now, I wanted to let everyone know how things are going
- going pretty well overall. I can still get around well, I still drive, no
seizures, no loss of balance issues yet, have not had any weight loss, as one
friend kindly pointed out to me, and I am trying to live each day as if it is a
gift, which it is.
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